This was almost the beginning of a year long dreaming with KB...I cannot post most of what happened, because it was personal between us...but I can post a few dreams. I spent most of my dreaming time with him, as he prepared to cross...and then the full year after tending to his fire, in dreaming, as he had asked me to...
There was a depth, in the darkness where all the surfaces are dense and translucent together...double dimensions, in a depth beyond them all...
I was in this place, in an apartment where I had not been before. There is a door to my right, that goes outdoors...a kitchen area to my front left, and behind me passed a partial wall, is a livingroom area. When I turn around to face the living room, the far wall, there is a window, some chairs, and the couch in the middle, facing the wall...and over to the right on the far wall, is another door going outdoors...There is a lamp over near the window and chairs that is on, because it is night, but over near the kitchen it is day, and bright. Time passes there...
I had come in the first door, and was going into the kitchen with the Horse lady, because something was cooking...the Horse lady was making the costumes for a play, and we had alot of things to do. But I noticed I needed to wash my hair? We were just about ready, and I was wondering where to wash my hair (another door off to the right when you come in the first door)
When all the kids (teenagers) for the play came in the other door...they were all upset and wanted to talk. I said I was too short to see them standing up, and they would all have to sit down, so they did, all around the room sort of in a circle, sitting on the chairs, the floor, the arms of the chairs...They were all upset, and all wanted to talk about it...so I said 'one at a time'...like a talking circle...
One smaller boy started talking, and he was crying, so I went over next to him and knelt down. He leaned on me like a little boy, and hugged me while he was telling me, he was dying...he had cancer, and that was why everyone was upset. It was a very deep conversation, with no words outloud, but they were very clear.
We were there for a while, and when he was done speaking, and his tears could calm down some, I asked him if his mother knew, and that she would understand and help him...and he smiled and pointed to the couch...his mother was sitting there smiling back at him and at me...she was someone I had seen a photo of from Etsy, Hazel's Grandaughter, which puzzled me a bit right then...
We had to leave, to get things ready for the play, and I wondered because none of the other kids were able to speak, but it seemed like they were alright, because the boy had spoken what they were all upset about.
For the play, it was a big wooden ship, a real one in the ocean, but right up next to the beach, about twenty feet off shore, with a little plank dock, and a dingy there...we were all on the ship for a moment, and then things shifted and I was standing invisible on the shore, watching...there was an old salty dawg kind of captain. He was acting the old salty, but he was really a captain, and he was teaching one of the boys about tying up the dingy...he had him pull it in, and tip it off...then he would ask the boy, 'do you think she is ready?'...the boy said yes, so the captian said to step to the other side of the dingy...and when the boy did, the rope went slack...and the captain saying to always be sure, or he would loose the dingy in the storms...
Then a larger shift, and me and the Horse lady were in an alley, by a whitewashed cement type of building with open windows...I mean no glass, just open...it was a long building to my right, and a dirt ground outdoors...the buildings to the left were wavering though, sometimes there making it an alley, and sometimes not, leaving it sunny and open.
There was a girl there too, we knew her, and she was looking for her school. She had a camera with her, and she said she just got a job taking photos...but she had to find the building...We could not go with her right then, so we just told her how to get there.
The Horse lady said the boy was inside, and she had to bring this to him (a paper bag with something in it) But when we got inside, she handed me the bag to give him, while she went to speak with the doctors...because this was a hospital.
There was a long hall that was not clean, and there was oozy moisture all along the floor edges...and the boy was on a hospital narrow bed at the end of the hall.
I went down there, and there was one of the metal silver tall trays on wheels, with an empty water bottle tipped over on it. He was laying there, and he said to me he was so thirsty, but not speaking outloud...I took the bottle and told him I would get him some water, don't worry...
And I gave him the bag before I went...he was Very happy to see it, he even smiled when he took it from me :)
I had to go down the hall, and around to the left, to find some water. There was another long hall just on the other side of the wall from the hall the boy was in...there was a sink partway down it, and at the end I could see the Horse lady near a bed there, and she was speaking with the doctors, about if the boy would stay, and what bed he would be in...there was the very deep solar plexus feeling...I knew the boy was staying, and I would not see him again.
I turned back to the sink, and it was grimey, like the floors there...like someone had tried to wash the floors, and rinsed out the mop, but then didn't clean the sink.
I didn't want to use it, but the boy was so thirsty...so I tried it. The water was cloudy, like a white cloudy...I let it run for a while, until it was a clear as it seemed it could get...and I half filled the bottle. Then I held it up to watch if the cloudyness went away, because maybe it was just air in the lines...I watched it hard, because it had to be clear for him to drink...and the cloud in it swirled narrower, and then smaller...until the water was clear. Then the solar plexus feeling lifted some, because at least he could drink.
I held up the bottle for the Horse lady to see, so she would know I was bringing him water, and she nodded, but kept speaking with the doctors.
I went back down the other hall to the boy then, and when I got there, we shifted into the bed area where the Horse lady was...the doctors were gone, and the Horse lady picked up a book that was in the bag...the other things in the bag were some squarish flat wax things filled with honey the boy had gotten from his bee friends...and some cake that the Horse lady had made him too. He was very happy she had brought him the honey, most of all.
The Horse lady had made the book, and it was beautiful. They opened it and were looking, so I saw too, it was a book of the play. And she had made it so all of the characters had window faces...so that the photos of the kids faces were all there, in their characters. It was that way through the whole book, and the illustrations were done so well, they looked just like what was around us when we were at the ship and in the pirates graveyard. The same deepness and the dark translucent feeling...he was so happy with it too...
Then for a moment, we shifted again, back into the first hallway, just the boy on the narrow bed, and me...but there were others around. A bunch of other people, all standing around, telling him things, like how much he would be missed, and how he was such a good boy...they were around him like crows, and he was getting that blank stare...like it was all noise.
I thought, they don't even know he likes honey, or what is his favorite cake...or that he really wants to be on the ship...they don't even know him...
He heard me, because we didn't need words...and he put his hand out. So I stepped over, and held his hand, and our hearts touched for that moment...and I was glad he was not alone with the crows. His eyes came back, the stare went away...and he said good bye to me. He made my heart smile, he was not afraid.
Then things shifted again, this time me and the Horse lady were in the pirates graveyard with all of the other kids for the play...it was night now, and there are huge trees, with great climbing branches, but they are very very big trees.
All the kids were climbing in the trees, all over the branches, and one of the girls almost fell. She slid down a long ways, and got a little bit hurt, but not badly...so then the Horse lady said to them all, that it was time to get back to doing the play.
The kids all started walking together through this graveyard, in the night, and we were walking behind them...and the energy had all calmed...
There was more, but then things shifted into other dreaming...
Sorry it is so long...Nyai calls them my short dreams. I wanted to show you though...
I was in this place, in an apartment where I had not been before. There is a door to my right, that goes outdoors...a kitchen area to my front left, and behind me passed a partial wall, is a livingroom area. When I turn around to face the living room, the far wall, there is a window, some chairs, and the couch in the middle, facing the wall...and over to the right on the far wall, is another door going outdoors...There is a lamp over near the window and chairs that is on, because it is night, but over near the kitchen it is day, and bright. Time passes there...
I had come in the first door, and was going into the kitchen with the Horse lady, because something was cooking...the Horse lady was making the costumes for a play, and we had alot of things to do. But I noticed I needed to wash my hair? We were just about ready, and I was wondering where to wash my hair (another door off to the right when you come in the first door)
When all the kids (teenagers) for the play came in the other door...they were all upset and wanted to talk. I said I was too short to see them standing up, and they would all have to sit down, so they did, all around the room sort of in a circle, sitting on the chairs, the floor, the arms of the chairs...They were all upset, and all wanted to talk about it...so I said 'one at a time'...like a talking circle...
One smaller boy started talking, and he was crying, so I went over next to him and knelt down. He leaned on me like a little boy, and hugged me while he was telling me, he was dying...he had cancer, and that was why everyone was upset. It was a very deep conversation, with no words outloud, but they were very clear.
We were there for a while, and when he was done speaking, and his tears could calm down some, I asked him if his mother knew, and that she would understand and help him...and he smiled and pointed to the couch...his mother was sitting there smiling back at him and at me...she was someone I had seen a photo of from Etsy, Hazel's Grandaughter, which puzzled me a bit right then...
We had to leave, to get things ready for the play, and I wondered because none of the other kids were able to speak, but it seemed like they were alright, because the boy had spoken what they were all upset about.
For the play, it was a big wooden ship, a real one in the ocean, but right up next to the beach, about twenty feet off shore, with a little plank dock, and a dingy there...we were all on the ship for a moment, and then things shifted and I was standing invisible on the shore, watching...there was an old salty dawg kind of captain. He was acting the old salty, but he was really a captain, and he was teaching one of the boys about tying up the dingy...he had him pull it in, and tip it off...then he would ask the boy, 'do you think she is ready?'...the boy said yes, so the captian said to step to the other side of the dingy...and when the boy did, the rope went slack...and the captain saying to always be sure, or he would loose the dingy in the storms...
Then a larger shift, and me and the Horse lady were in an alley, by a whitewashed cement type of building with open windows...I mean no glass, just open...it was a long building to my right, and a dirt ground outdoors...the buildings to the left were wavering though, sometimes there making it an alley, and sometimes not, leaving it sunny and open.
There was a girl there too, we knew her, and she was looking for her school. She had a camera with her, and she said she just got a job taking photos...but she had to find the building...We could not go with her right then, so we just told her how to get there.
The Horse lady said the boy was inside, and she had to bring this to him (a paper bag with something in it) But when we got inside, she handed me the bag to give him, while she went to speak with the doctors...because this was a hospital.
There was a long hall that was not clean, and there was oozy moisture all along the floor edges...and the boy was on a hospital narrow bed at the end of the hall.
I went down there, and there was one of the metal silver tall trays on wheels, with an empty water bottle tipped over on it. He was laying there, and he said to me he was so thirsty, but not speaking outloud...I took the bottle and told him I would get him some water, don't worry...
And I gave him the bag before I went...he was Very happy to see it, he even smiled when he took it from me :)
I had to go down the hall, and around to the left, to find some water. There was another long hall just on the other side of the wall from the hall the boy was in...there was a sink partway down it, and at the end I could see the Horse lady near a bed there, and she was speaking with the doctors, about if the boy would stay, and what bed he would be in...there was the very deep solar plexus feeling...I knew the boy was staying, and I would not see him again.
I turned back to the sink, and it was grimey, like the floors there...like someone had tried to wash the floors, and rinsed out the mop, but then didn't clean the sink.
I didn't want to use it, but the boy was so thirsty...so I tried it. The water was cloudy, like a white cloudy...I let it run for a while, until it was a clear as it seemed it could get...and I half filled the bottle. Then I held it up to watch if the cloudyness went away, because maybe it was just air in the lines...I watched it hard, because it had to be clear for him to drink...and the cloud in it swirled narrower, and then smaller...until the water was clear. Then the solar plexus feeling lifted some, because at least he could drink.
I held up the bottle for the Horse lady to see, so she would know I was bringing him water, and she nodded, but kept speaking with the doctors.
I went back down the other hall to the boy then, and when I got there, we shifted into the bed area where the Horse lady was...the doctors were gone, and the Horse lady picked up a book that was in the bag...the other things in the bag were some squarish flat wax things filled with honey the boy had gotten from his bee friends...and some cake that the Horse lady had made him too. He was very happy she had brought him the honey, most of all.
The Horse lady had made the book, and it was beautiful. They opened it and were looking, so I saw too, it was a book of the play. And she had made it so all of the characters had window faces...so that the photos of the kids faces were all there, in their characters. It was that way through the whole book, and the illustrations were done so well, they looked just like what was around us when we were at the ship and in the pirates graveyard. The same deepness and the dark translucent feeling...he was so happy with it too...
Then for a moment, we shifted again, back into the first hallway, just the boy on the narrow bed, and me...but there were others around. A bunch of other people, all standing around, telling him things, like how much he would be missed, and how he was such a good boy...they were around him like crows, and he was getting that blank stare...like it was all noise.
I thought, they don't even know he likes honey, or what is his favorite cake...or that he really wants to be on the ship...they don't even know him...
He heard me, because we didn't need words...and he put his hand out. So I stepped over, and held his hand, and our hearts touched for that moment...and I was glad he was not alone with the crows. His eyes came back, the stare went away...and he said good bye to me. He made my heart smile, he was not afraid.
Then things shifted again, this time me and the Horse lady were in the pirates graveyard with all of the other kids for the play...it was night now, and there are huge trees, with great climbing branches, but they are very very big trees.
All the kids were climbing in the trees, all over the branches, and one of the girls almost fell. She slid down a long ways, and got a little bit hurt, but not badly...so then the Horse lady said to them all, that it was time to get back to doing the play.
The kids all started walking together through this graveyard, in the night, and we were walking behind them...and the energy had all calmed...
There was more, but then things shifted into other dreaming...
Sorry it is so long...Nyai calls them my short dreams. I wanted to show you though...
~~~~~~~~~
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